Money is one of the top sources of conflict in relationships—and for good reason. Your financial values, habits, and goals play a major role in your long-term compatibility. While no couple sees eye-to-eye on every financial matter, certain behaviors can be red flags that signal deeper issues. In this article, we’ll explore the top financial red flags to watch for in relationships and what to do if you spot them.

**1. Secrecy About Money**
If your partner is evasive about their income, debts, spending, or financial history, it may be cause for concern. Financial secrecy often points to trust issues or potential problems like hidden debt or irresponsible spending. In a healthy relationship, financial transparency is key.

**What to Do:** Have an open and honest conversation about money early in the relationship. Talk about your financial backgrounds, habits, and current obligations.

**2. Excessive Spending or Impulse Buying**
A partner who constantly makes large, unplanned purchases—especially beyond their means—may struggle with impulse control. This behavior can derail your shared financial goals and create long-term debt.

**What to Do:** Discuss budgeting and long-term goals. Consider setting limits on individual discretionary spending or using a shared app to track expenses.

**3. Refusal to Budget or Plan**
If your partner avoids budgeting, saving, or setting financial goals, it may signal a lack of discipline or foresight. While spontaneity can be fun, ignoring financial planning can lead to future hardship.

**What to Do:** Suggest setting shared goals like saving for a vacation or buying a home. Work together to create a budget and review it regularly.

**4. Controlling Financial Behavior**
When one partner restricts access to money, monitors every purchase, or insists on managing all the finances without input, it may be a sign of financial abuse. This kind of control can erode trust and lead to resentment or manipulation.

**What to Do:** Insist on shared financial decision-making and equal access to accounts and information. If control escalates, consider seeking help from a counselor or financial therapist.

**5. Constant Borrowing With No Repayment**
A pattern of borrowing money from you (or others) without paying it back may indicate poor financial responsibility or deeper issues like addiction or chronic mismanagement.

**What to Do:** Set clear boundaries and avoid enabling the behavior. Encourage them to seek help if needed.

**6. Disregard for Credit or Debt**
If your partner shows little concern for their credit score, carries high-interest debt without a repayment plan, or frequently misses payments, it may affect your future together—especially if you plan to buy a home or co-sign loans.

**What to Do:** Review credit reports together and make a plan to improve scores. Be cautious about combining finances until their habits improve.

**7. Differing Financial Goals**
While it’s normal to have different priorities, radically conflicting financial goals—like one partner wanting to save aggressively while the other prefers to live in the moment—can create friction.

**What to Do:** Compromise. Set short- and long-term goals together and find common ground.

**8. Avoidance of Financial Conversations**
If your partner shuts down or becomes defensive whenever you bring up money, it’s a red flag. Financial communication is essential in a healthy relationship.

**What to Do:** Choose a neutral time to talk, avoid blame, and frame the conversation around shared goals and mutual respect.

**Final Thoughts**
Financial red flags don’t always mean the relationship is doomed, but they do require attention and action. Honest communication, shared values, and a willingness to grow together are key. If problems persist or escalate, seeking professional help—from a counselor or financial advisor—can make a big difference. Remember, your financial health and emotional well-being are equally important in any relationship.